So this is pretty close to the one I have - only black - and I don't look this good in it!!!
Anyway, so you can imagine if you are wearing a dress and you have to go to the restroom, NO WAY could you possibly strip down to do so! Sooooo...there are some nifty little eye hook straps in the crotch area for ease. Got me? Well, imagine if you undid all 4 of these eye hooks and now you have to "re-hook" them!! Do you think I could be able to bend in such a way that you could actually see what you are doing? Nope, not me! So my solution has always been to - ready? - just move it aside and hold it until I'm done! For a year now, this has proven to work just fine....UNTIL TODAY.
Yes, I peed on my spanx. Ugghh... Not just on the bottom, but almost half way up my right butt cheek! It is 10am, and I will have to deal with a wet bottom until it decides to dry. I have to sit at my desk to work, so you guessed it - now a part of my dress is a little damp as well! Don't worry, I have sprayed myself so I won't end up smelling like some old lady who wets her bed, or has to wear a depends or something like that. And in time, it will dry. I guess this is just another reason as to why I really need to concentrate on shedding a few pounds...if I lose a little weight, I won't feel I have to wear the spanx, and in turn - won't wet myself prematurley!!
Just keeping it real.
Oh mother---I SOOO needed that today!!! I am laughing so hard I have TEARS!!!! Thanks for a good laugh!!
ReplyDeleteI tried a spanx a few years ago and I had to take it off in my car before a wedding.....it was sooo tight I thought I was going to hyperventalte and pass out!!! So I had to pull over on the side of the road, and try to get this thing off, sitting in the drivers seat without taking the dress off----you could then see my gut, but at least I coule breathe!!!
Love You!!!
That is hilarious Lori! Thanks for a good laugh:) I too cannot breath in spanks...oh what we do to try and look a few pounds lighter!!
ReplyDeleteThank you to Jodi for requesting that everyone read this post:)
ReplyDeleteDefinitely the laugh I needed today!!
That was great... I was in need for a good laugh... Mom you are too damn funny!! I can just see the whole thing in my head!! HAHAHAHA... THANKS FOR THE LAUGH MOM
ReplyDeleteLOVE YOU
That is hilarious Lori! Yes, thanks to Jodi for sending us to your blog today for a good laugh. I have too worn spanx and I know exactly what you mean about having to use the restroom -- I just tried really hard not to go - never even crossed my mind to do the "pull over" - guess it's good that I didn't try it, as I'm sure I would have had a similar story.
ReplyDeleteHOLY COW....... I too had tears from laughing so hard. THANKS!! I sure hope you didn't stay "damp" ALL day:)
ReplyDeleteI totally think the same thing!! Only mine goes down my legs like short shorts... and there is a "crack" in the crotch. You are supposed to open up there and pee. I am TERRIFIED everytime I have to do that!! I can just imagine my pee shooting off to the side!! Now you are really going to have me worried!! Thanks for "keeping it real" :)
ReplyDeleteHey Lori, Didn't know you had a blog!:) Reminds me of peeing on a gravel road years ago with bibbies on and peeing on the strap...did that a few times:) Probably with you!
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